Friday, March 11, 2011

HOT NAKED ELF CHICK TAKES IT IN THE FACE!


I most sincerely apologize to all of you out there searching the internet, now-wilting cock in hand, looking for naked elves.

You're here because this guy had the idea of taking advantage of the fact that posts named, or containing, "hot elf chicks" draws a lot of hits from search engines, and that we could use this to promote our little warped community of old-school tabletop RPGs.

Did it work? Are you excited that instead of wank material you're getting nerdly proselytizing?

And what the hell are you wanting to wank to elves for? Fuckin' pervert.

18 comments:

  1. Been a huge rash of "Hot Elf Chicks" swarming the blogs the last few days.....:)

    PS: I just posted a short post about your "I Hate Fun" mostly because I hate fun too...

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  2. Thanks Jim, I'm glad to know that when the old school bloggers zig, you're still going to zag.

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  3. with these last couple posts Jim,
    it appears you have gone F.A.T.A.L. ; - )

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  4. *gets out the tape measure*

    Bend over.

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  5. As usual, Jim takes it to the next level. Great post :D

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  6. You know, this reminds me of a bit from my own campaign.

    This was using Maliszewski's Ruined Monastery (from Fight On! #1), the final encounter was this group of humanoids and I think a half-breed leading them, half-orc or half-goblin or something. (details are fuzzy, this is from two and a half years ago or something)

    Anyway, the party defeats the group of humanoids and takes the leader prisoner. They interrogate him about finding the key to the door (the Death Frost Doom dungeon was originally placed as the second level of this thing).

    After they are done questioning him, one of the party's clerics (both in the party were women playing women) then sentences him to death for evildoing, and brings her maul down on his head while he's tied up. She rolls maximum damage and so I rule that the guy's head basically explodes in a gory cloud, spattering everyone in the room with bits of skull and brain.

    This also made it very convenient for finding a tooth for the basin down below.

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  7. And look, the hot elf chick is face-planted by the Star of David wearing/wielding cleric from the pic earlier this week. She definitely has something against elves. Who can blame her, really?

    P.S. Oops, sorry. It's a heptacle.

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  8. In my blog, I just raped the damn elf, but you crushed the skull of yours! You Sir, are my hero!!! *salute*

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  9. Oh Jim! You hilarious rapscallion you!

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  10. In my blog, I just raped the damn elf, but you crushed the skull of yours! You Sir, are my hero!!! *salute*

    When women talk about how people who play D&D are creepy and make them uncomfortable, they're probably talking about dudes like this. They might only ever have run into one or two, but they tend to make an impression.

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  11. The really creepy thing: we all know there's some guy out there who 'didn't' go limp when he got here.

    *shiver*

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  12. Depending on how much money the guy's got, artists can milk him for a ton of money doing "girl in musketeer outfit kills naked elves" pics, since there's not much of that sort of thing out there.

    I think.

    *fears typing the phrase into Google*

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  13. Oddysey,

    I hear you. Not only women find that creepy...

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